英语手抄报笑话素材
一、我是单身汉
Jack feell off his bicycle and got hurt. A beautiful young nurse asked him to fill forms. Jack finished them and gave them back."Anything else?" The nurse asked. "Yes,"Jack thinks for a while and said,"I'm a bachelor."
杰克骑车摔伤，得住院治疗。一位年轻美貌的护士拿着表格让填。仞杰克填好递上表格"还有什么漏填的?"护士问. "有!"杰克想了想说，"我是个单身汉."
二、死予肝癌的人100%都吃饭
Wife:You see.According to te statistics on the paper 80% of those who have died of liver cancer have drunk alcoho. Husband:It's okey. To my investigation, all Thespeopleeat meals.
妻子：你看这张报纸，据统计，死于肝癌的人80%都是喝酒的。 丈夫：那有什么?据我调查，死予肝癌的人100%都吃饭的。
三、位置上的冰激凌
"Excuse me,but the seat you've taken is mine." "Yours?Can you prove it?" "Yes,I put a cup of ice cream on it."
"请原谅，你占了我的位置." "你的位置?你能征明这点吗?" "能，我在位置上放了杯 冰激凌."
四、别无选择
One day,Eve asked Adam,"Doyou really love me?" Adam said helplessly,"Do I have any other choice?"
一天，夏娃问亚当："你当真爱我吗?" 亚当无可奈何地回答："我还有的选择吗?"
五、没有向我敬礼
A private didn't notice a young lieutenant and failed to salute him. The lieutenant said sternly, "You did not salute me. For this you must immediately salute one hundred times." Just then the general came up. When he saw the poor private about to begin, he exclaimed, "What's all this?" The lieutenant explained, "This ignoramus(无知的人) failed to salute me. I'm making his salute one hundred times as a punishment.” "Quite right," replied the general smiling, "But do not forget, sir, that upon each occasion you are to salute return."
有个士兵没有注意到一个年轻的陆军中尉，没有向他敬礼。中尉很严厉地对那个士兵说：“你没有向我敬礼，因此你要马上敬100个礼。” 这时候将军过来了。他看到那个可怜的士兵就要开始敬礼时，就大声问道：“这是怎么啦?” 中尉解释说：“这个蠢货没有向我敬礼，我就罚他马上向我敬一百个礼。” 将军笑着说：“完全正确。不过，老弟，别忘了他向你每敬一个礼，你都要回礼的啊!”