令人爆笑的英语故事

时间：2022-10-21 13:25:13 笑话故事我要投稿

令人爆笑的英语故事

　　在学习、工作乃至生活中，大家都经常接触到文案吧，文案用于分享自己的生活态度和人生感悟。那些被广泛运用的文案都是什么样子的呢？下面是小编为大家收集的令人爆笑的英语故事，欢迎大家分享。

令人爆笑的英语故事

　　令人爆笑的英语故事1

　　Midway Tactics

　　Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.

　　The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"

　　The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"

　　The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".

　　译：中间战术

　　三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。

　　右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌，上书：“大减价!”“特便宜!”

　　左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌，声称：“大砍价!”“大折扣!”

　　中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌，上面只简单地写着：“入口处”。

　　Five Months Older

　　The Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.

　　But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s papers, he was surprised.

　　"How old are you?" he said.

　　"Eighteen, sir," said John.

　　"But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?"

　　"Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am."

　　译：大五个月

　　第二次世界大战开始了，约翰想参军，可他只有十六岁，当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。所以军医给他进行体检时，他说他已经十八岁了。

　　可约翰的哥哥刚入伍没几天，而且也是这个军医给他做的检查。这位医生还记得他哥哥的姓。所以当他看到约翰的表格时，感到非常惊奇。

　　“你多大了?”军医问。

　　“十八，长官。”约翰说。

　　“可你的哥哥也是十八岁，你们是双胞胎吗?”

　　约翰脸红了，说：“哦，不是，长官，我哥哥比我大五个月。”

　　令人爆笑的英语故事2

　　A little panda picks up a pumpkin and wants to take it home. But the pumpkin is too big. The panda can’t take it home.

　　一只小熊猫摘了一只大南瓜，想把它拿回家。但是这只南瓜太大了，她没有办法把这么大的南瓜带回家。

　　Suddenly she sees a bear riding a bike toward her. She watches the bike. “I know! I have a good idea.” she jumps and shouts happily, “I can roll a pumpkin. It’s like a wheel.”

　　突然她看见一只狗熊骑着一辆自行车朝她这边来。她看着自行车，跳着说：“有了！我有办法了。我可以把南瓜滚回家去。南瓜好像车轮。

　　So she rolls the pumpkin to her home. When her mother sees the big pumpkin, she is surprised, “Oh, my God! How can you carry it home?” the little panda answers proudly, “I can’t lift it, but I can roll it.” Her mother smiled and says，“What a clever girl!”

　　于是她把那瓜滚回家。当她妈妈看到这只大南瓜的时候，很惊讶：“天啊！这么食的南瓜！你是怎么把它带回家来的？”小熊猫自豪地说；“我拎不动它，可是我能滚动它啊！”她妈妈微笑着说：“真聪明啊！”

　　令人爆笑的英语故事3

　　It’s sunny day in spring. Miss Cat is fishing. Suddenly the fishing rod moves. “Great! Oh, it’s so heavy!” Miss Cat says happily.

　　这是春天里一个阳光明媚的日子，猫小姐在河边钓鱼。突然鱼竿动了动。“太棒了！哇，好重啊！”猫小姐高兴地喊着。

　　The fish is plucked out of the river. “Oh, a big fish! How big the fish is!” She cheers. But she puts the fish into the river and goes on fishing.

　　鱼被拉出来了。“啊！一条大鱼！这条大鱼可真大呀！”她欢呼道。但是她却把鱼放回河里，又继续钓鱼。

　　At the time Mr. Horse goes by and sees it. “Why do you set it free?” He asks. “Because my pot is too small, I can’t cook it,” Miss Cat says.

　　这时候马先生路过，看见这一切，就问她：“为什么你把鱼放了？” “因为我的锅太小。我没办法烧这么大的鱼。”猫小姐回答说。

　　令人爆笑的英语故事4

　　An ox and a dog serve for the same farmer.

　　一头牛和一只狗同时为一个农夫工作。

　　One day the dog arrogantly says: “How grand I am! In the daytime, I watch out for the cattle in the meadows; at night, I guard the house. But you…”

　　一天, 狗骄傲地说着；‘我是多么重要啊！白天我在牧场看护家群，晚上我看家。而你呢…..?”

　　“Me? How about me?” the ox says

　　“我？我怎么啦？“牛反问。

　　“You can only plough or draw a cart,” the dog slightly says.

　　“你只会犁地或是拉车。”狗轻微地说。

　　“Yes. It’s true,” the ox says. “But if I don’t plough, what do you guard?”

　　“是的。你说得没有错，”牛回答道。“但是如果没有我犁地，你看护什么呢？”

　　令人爆笑的英语故事5

　　一、嫁给最强壮的动物

　　Once there was a little ant. She wanted to get married, but she only wanted to marry the strongest creature.

　　She wanted to marry the strongest creature, but she didn’t know who the strongest creature is. She saw the wind blow houses down. So she thought the wind was the strongest creature. She wanted to marry the wind.

　　But the wind told the little ant that ht wasn’t the strongest creature. There was a tower in the forest. He had stood there for a thousand years against his force. The tower was the strongest creature.

　　“Why do you want to marry me?” the wind asked.

　　“Because you are the strongest creature in the world. You are strongest than the wind.” said the ant.

　　“You are right. I’m strongest than the wind. But I’m not the strongest creature in the world. Look, how I’m damaged! Can’t you guess who has done this to me? It’s you, ants.”

　　At last, the little ant married her own kind. Because they were the strongest creatures.

　　从前有一只小蚂蚁。她想结婚，但她只想嫁给最强壮的人。

　　她想嫁给最强壮的动物，但她不知道谁是最强壮的动物。她看见风把房子吹倒了。所以她认为风是最强壮的生物。她想嫁给风。

　　但是风告诉小蚂蚁，HT不是最强的生物。森林里有一座塔。他在那里站了一千年反抗他的队伍。塔是最强壮的生物。

　　“你为什么要嫁给我？”风问。

　　“因为你是世界上最强壮的动物。”。蚂蚁说：“你比风更强壮。”。

　　“你说得对。我比风更强大。但我不是世界上最强壮的动物。看，我怎么被损坏了！你猜不出是谁给我做的吗？是你，蚂蚁。”

　　最后，小蚂蚁嫁给了她自己的同类。因为它们是最强壮的动物。

　　二、成功之道

　　A young rich man to consult a success, but the rich man took three different sizes in front of a watermelon on the youth, "If each piece of watermelon on behalf of the interests of a certain extent, you choose that piece?"

　　"Of course is the biggest piece of!" Young did not hesitate to answer.

　　Rich man smiled: "Well, please now!" Rich people to the biggest piece of watermelon to the youth, while they eat the smallest piece.

　　Soon, rich on the finish, and then pick up the last piece of watermelon table proudly shook the face of the young, with big stuttering.

　　Young people immediately understand the meaning of the rich: the rich man does not eat the melon melon young people, and eat more than young people.

　　If each piece of watermelon on behalf of the interests of a certain degree, then the interests of rich natural possession of more than youth.

　　Eating watermelon, rich youth said: "To be successful, we must learn to give up, only to give up immediate interests in order to obtain long-term Italian, and this is my success."

　　一个青年向一个富翁请教成功之道，富翁却拿了三块大小不一的西瓜放在青年面前，“如果每块西瓜代表一定程度的利益，你选那块?”

　　“当然是最大的那块!”青年毫不犹豫地回答。

　　富翁一笑：“那好，请吧!”富翁把那块最大的西瓜递给青年，而自己却吃起了最小的那块。

　　很快，富翁就吃完了，随后拿起桌上的最后一块西瓜得意地在青年面前晃了晃，大口吃起来。

　　青年马上明白了富翁的意思：富翁吃的.瓜虽无青年的瓜大，却比青年吃得多。如果每块西瓜代表一定程度的利益，那么富翁占有的利益自然比青年多。

　　吃完西瓜，富翁对青年说：“要想成功，就要学会放弃，只有放弃眼前利益，才能获取长远大利，这就是我的成功之道。”

　　令人爆笑的英语故事6

　　In the lush, scenic lakeside, a happy family of wild geese lives. Among them, there is a wild goose, is a flying champion, the hunting expert, the geese are very envious of it. Gradually, it became proud of the geese.

　　When autumn came, the wild goose called all the people together and said, "tomorrow morning, we will fly to the south. It's a long way off, so be prepared."

　　"I'm not taking off with you. You're all flying too slow!" "The proud goose thought.

　　The next day, just after dawn, the wild geese began their migration. The proud goose flew out as fast as it could.

　　'come back, that would be dangerous! "Cried the wild goose. But the proud goose did not seem to hear it, and, after a while, it was gone.

　　After a few hours of flying, the wild goose family has been far behind, the proud goose is very proud: "it is a group of waste, how does this speed match with me to take off?"

　　Flying, the sky suddenly changed face, blowing a strong wind. Just for a moment, the proud goose was tired and hungry. It had to stop and look for food on the grass.

　　Just as it was enjoying the delicious fruit of the wild fruit, a fox came at it, and the wild goose flew in the air. The scene happened to be seen by the hedgehog, the hedgehog asked with concern, "why don't you take off with everyone? How dangerous it is!

　　"I'm a flying champion. I can fly!" "Replied the goose proudly.

　　As night fell, the wild goose found a quiet place to sleep. The sly fox found the wild goose again, and jumped at it. Little hedgehog just passing by, quickly huddled up, roll to the fox's mouth in the past, a little fox mouthful is blood, pain fox fled back to his "nest". Little hedgehog came over and said to the proud geese: "you still go with you, it's too dangerous!" The proud goose was frightened, and it began to realize its danger.

　　The night is deep, the wind is blowing, the thunder is thundering. The heavy rain fell from the sky. The goose was shaking all over, and he felt the loneliness and fear that had never been felt before. He really regretted not having gone with us. So it decided to wait here.

　　The next afternoon, the proud geese finally looked forward to the wild goose family. "Welcome back!" he said happily. The proud goose bowed its head.

　　Under the leadership of the wild goose uncle, through the joint efforts, the wild goose family has successfully reached the destination, the arrogant goose is no longer proud.

　　令人爆笑的英语故事7

　　Mike is my little brother. He is a naughty boy.

　　麦克是我的小弟弟，他是个调皮的孩子。

　　On Sunday morning Mike went into the yard and played with a dog. Sometimes a birdwould come down to stay on the top of the dog's house. Then Mike threw a stone at it. Suddenly the little boy began crying. Mother ran to Mike and asked him what was wrong. He said, “I've broken sister's plate. She has beaten me.” “Why?” “I threw it at a bird, and it went straight to the plate.”

　　星期天的早上，麦克跑到院子里跟小狗玩。恰巧，一直小鸟落在狗舍上，麦克就用石头砸它。突然，这个小男孩哭了起来。妈妈跑过去问出了什么事。他哭着说：“我姐姐盘子摔碎了，她打了我！”“为什么？”“我拿石头砸一直小鸟，但是却打碎了姐姐的盘子。”

　　Such was my naught brother.

　　哎，这是我淘气的弟弟。

　　令人爆笑的英语故事8

　　Long ago there was a chess master named Qiu whose chess skills were superlative.

　　Qiu had two students who studied chess with him, one student studied with concentrated focus and energy. The other, however, wasn’t like that, he thought studying chess was very easy, and there was no need to take it seriously. When the teacher was explaining, although the [the student] sat there, his eyes seemed to be on the chess pieces, he was actually thinking: “If I go to the countryside right now and shoot a goose, I’ll have a lovely dinner.” Because he was always indulging in flights of fancy and absent-mindedness, nothing the teacher said ever sunk in.

　　As a result, although the two students studied were taught at the same time by the same master, one improved quickly and became a superior chess player, while the other never learned much at all.

　　从前有一个下棋能手名叫秋，他的棋艺非常高超。

　　秋有两个学生，一起跟他学习下棋，其中一个学生非常专心集中精力跟老师学习。另一个却不这样，他认为学下棋很容易，用不着认真。老师讲解的时候，他虽然坐在那里，眼睛也好像在看着棋子可心里却想着：“要是现在到野外射下一只鸿雁，美餐一顿该多好。 ”因为他总是胡思乱想心不在焉，老师的讲解一点也没听进去。

　　结果，虽然两个学生同是一个名师传授，但是，一个进步很快，成了棋艺高强的名手，另一个却没学到一点本事。

　　令人爆笑的英语故事9

　　I have a lovely dog named Bobby.He looks pretty with short legs,big ears and short tail.He is my good friend and he is also easy to take care of.I walk him at least twice a day,feed him and spend time with him.He also gives his love to me in return.

　　He is always there to lick me and lie on me.I like playing with him.I think he can tell when I am happy,sad,angry or troubled.Sometimes he can be noisy and run around the room.In a word,he is not only my dog,but also my friend.

　　I love him. He can roll on the floor. He can play balls with me. He can look after my house when I am out. Bobby is very clever. But sometimes he isn’t.

　　One day Bobby runs away. He is out for three days. After he comes back, I tie him to a tree and give him some food. Bobby begins to eat. But then he stops. He sees a fox. The fox is looking at his food. Bobby barks and barks. He wants to catch the fox. But he can’t. The fox runs round the tree. Bobby runs after the fox. So the rope goes ground the tree. Of course Bobby can’t run. Quickly he eats up the food and runs away.

　　令人爆笑的英语故事10

　　The little bird flew away, feeling a little tired, just trying to find a place to rest. Suddenly, "whimpering," there was a sad cry in the distance. Who was this?

　　I flew close to worry, it was a little squirrel. "Little squirrel, why are you crying so sad?" he asked softly. "The little squirrel said sadly," my two companions starved to death two days ago. You see, the trees here are almost all cut off." The bird looked around, and it was not right. The place had been here before, and she said, "it used to be a thick forest, and the air was fresh. Many animal friends like to get together here... "The little squirrel cried even more bitterly. The bird watched the little squirrel cry and said, "don't cry, you still go to find a place where you can live, and then you say goodbye to the little squirrel.

　　The little bird went on flying, and felt thirsty. He flew to a small river, and just wanted to drink water, but there came a painful groan from the water. Don't drink the water, the water... The pollution is serious, you see... Look, my brothers and sisters are almost dead... "Because I was so thirsty, I didn't look at it closely, but I couldn't help but gasp. The river. Many of the fish were poisoned to death, and even if they did not die, they were doomed.

　　Bird trying in vain thirsty, continue to fly ah fly, insist on not to live any longer, finally came to the human residential, she finally can your thirst, she meet to drink a full, and then began her journey.

　　The little bird flew on and on, but today, what happened? She felt very tired, she seemed to have a cold, she had difficulty breathing, she flew, she could not hold on any longer, she slowly fell to the side of the hut. In her coma, she seemed to hear the distant factory "thundering" of the machine, not far away, a chimney blowing smoke... She even vaguely saw a very high sign that read: death zone.

　　Then she heard death scream: come, there are so many of your friends here... Poor in vain, she wished to say to mankind, "mankind, mankind, cherish the earth, that is to cherish yourselves! "

　　Can you hear the bird, man?

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