古今英语笑话200字以内
让我们一同来分享应届毕业生小编为你准备的英语笑话吧。
A Man Who Said No 说不的男子
A friend of mine noticed a man staggering about in the Times Square subway station. A well-dressed Wall Street type, his coat was unbuttoned, a briefcase dangled from his hand and he'd obviously had one too many.
Asked if he was all right, the man gave a slurred but affirmative response. However, my friend simply could not see someone brave the rough maw of a New York subway without trying to help. He followed the chap, and again asked, "Are you sure you're all right? What subway are you looking for? Do you need help getting home?"
At last, the object of his attentions snarled, in a low voice, "Leave me alone! I'm an undercover cop!"
我的一位朋友看到一个男子在时代广场的地铁车站摇摇晃晃地走。那个人穿着时髦,敞着怀,一个手提箱在他的手里悬吊着,很明显他是多喝了一杯。
我朋友问他怎么样,那男子含糊而肯定地回答说没问题。然而我朋友就是不能眼看着有人在纽约地铁独入是非之地而置之不顾。他跟在那家伙的后面,又一次问道:“你肯定你没事?你在找哪个地铁站?你需要帮忙回家吗?”
他所注意的对象终于忍耐不住了,对他低声咆哮道:“你给我走开!我是便衣警察!”
A Gentle Reminder委婉提醒
Having been married a long time, my husband sometimes needs a gentle reminder of a special occasion. On the morning of our 35th anniversary, we were sitting at the breakfast table when I hinted, "Honey, do you realize that we've been sitting in these same two seats for exactly 35 years?"
Putting down the newspaper, he looked straight at me and said, "So, you want to switch seats?"
婚后已久,我丈夫往往在一个特别事情上需要委婉的'提醒。在我们结婚35周年纪念的早上,我们正坐在早餐桌旁,我暗示道:“亲爱的,你意识到我们在这两个相同的座位上已坐了整整35年了吗?”
他放下报纸,眼睛直直地望着我:“因此,你想交换座位吗?”
The King's Brother 国王的兄弟
A poor man, presenting himself before the King of Spain,asked his charity, telling him that he was his brother. Theking desiring to know how he claimed kindred to him, the poorfellow replied,“We are all descended from one common fatherand mother—viz., Adam and Eve.” Upon which the kinggave him a little copper piece of money. The poor man beganto bemoan himself, saying,“Is it possible that your Majestyshould give no more than this to your brother?”“Away,away,”replies the king;“if all the brothers you have in theworld give you as much as I have done, you'll be richer than Iam.”
一个穷汉去见西班牙国王,说自己是他的兄弟,求他施恩周济。国王想知道他何以攀认亲戚,穷汉回答说,“我们有共同的祖先——亚当和夏娃。”听了这话,国王就给了他一个小铜子儿。于是穷人开始叫屈,说:“难道您国王陛下就给兄弟这么一点点钱吗?”“走开,快走,”国王回答,“如果世界上你所有的兄弟们都像我这样给你一个铜板,你就比我还有钱了。”
老虎来了
When a Tiger comes Two guys were walking through the jungle. All of a sudden, a tiger appears from a distance, running towards them. One of the guys takes out a pair of "Nikes" from his bag and starts to put them on. The other guy with a surprised look and exclaims, "Do you think you will run faster than the tiger with those?" His friend replies: "I don't have to out run it, I just have to run faster than you."
两个男人正在穿过丛林,突然,一只老虎出现在远处,向他们冲来。当中的一个人从包里拿出一双“耐克”跑鞋,开始穿上。另一个人惊奇地看着他说,“你以为穿上跑鞋就可以跑得过老虎吗?” 他的朋友回答道:“我不用跑得过它,我只要跑得比你快就行了。”
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