搞笑英语幽默笑话

时间：2020-09-04 14:54:35 英语笑话我要投稿

搞笑英语幽默笑话集锦

　　幽默的人不仅仅会说笑话，还要懂得他人说的笑话，来测试一下你的幽默细胞的指数有多高吧!

搞笑英语幽默笑话集锦

　　搞笑英语幽默笑话篇一：Bishop Creighton(克莱顿主教)

　　Creighton was going along a West End square when hesaw a little fellow trying to reach the knocker of a large house.

　　“Can't you reach up so high?”queried the Bishop kindly.

　　“No， sir，” said the small youngster.

　　“Well， then， let me help you，” and the Bishop mountedthe three steps and gave a splendid rattat.

　　The little boy glanced hastily at the gentleman of the cloth.“Come on，” he yelled，“we must boaf run nar.”

　　当克莱顿主教沿着伦敦西区的一个广场走着的时候，他看见一个小家伙正试图抓住一所大房子的门环。

　　“你是不是够不到这么高的`地方呢?”主教好意地问。

　　“是的，先生。”那小孩说。

　　“那好，让我来帮你。”主教登上那三级台阶，在门上重重扣了几下。

　　那个小男孩急忙给教士递上一个眼色。“快跑，”他喊着：“我们俩都得跑。”

　　搞笑英语幽默笑话篇二：Post Haste

　　My husband asked me to go to the post office to mail his resume in anticipation of a job interview. He instructed me to send it the fastest way possible.

　　Struck by the urgency in his voice, I grabbed a handful of change and dashed out the door. Arriving at the post office, I rushed to the counter and breathlessly explained to the clerk that my envelope had to be delivered immediately . He casually weighed the envelope and said it would cost $ 10.03.I fumbled through my pockets and tallied up my coins. "But I don't have $ 10. 03, " I said. He punched some more buttons and said, "Okay, that will be $ 7. 40, ma am.

　　Once more I said in dismay, "Sorry, I don't have $ 7.40.

　　"Well," he sighed, "exactly how much do you have?"

　　I meekly answered, "I have exactly $ 2. 15, sir."

　　With that, he yelled over his shoulder to a coworker, "Hey, Charlie, get the pigeon ready.

　　搞笑英语幽默笑话篇三：Day after Day

　　A teacher was always so involved in the text being studied that he never looked up . He would call on a student for translation and explanation, and-without realizing it-he often chose the same student day after day. Out of respect, the student wouldn't point this out to him. 　　After being called on four days in a row, a student named Goldberg asked advice from his friends. The next day when the teacher said "Goldberg, translate and explain," Goldberg replied, "Goldberg is absent today ."

　　"All right," said the teacher. "YOU translate and explain.

　　搞笑英语幽默笑话篇四：Horne Tooke(霍恩·图克)

　　George Ⅲ asked the once wellknown wit， Horne Tooke，whether he could play cards.

　　“Your Majesty，” replied Tooke，“ I am a mere childwhere cards are concerned. I cannot even tell a King from aKnave.”

　　乔治三世问一度大名鼎鼎的才子霍恩·图克，会不会玩纸牌。

　　“陛下，”图克回答说：“在玩纸牌方面，我只不过是幼儿园的水平。我甚至分不清国王和无赖。”

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